9 Feb 2009

The 'These People Actually Get Paid?' Awards for Poor Journalism 2008

The saga continues...

Most pitiful review:


'Playing Metal Gear Solid 4 was the most fun I’ve had in my life but sometimes I caught myself feeling guilty for using a combination of tranquilizer gun, strong arsenal and the NV mod...' - Anon, The Sixth Axis

If ever I think one of my reviews is leaning towards the realm of unerringly applauding fanboy, I look towards this Metal Gear Solid 4 review and realise that I'm not quite there yet.

If only half the passion this person had could be put towards some sort of charitable purpose, I think we'd all be living in a better, happier world. Never before have I seen such overtly hyperbolic sentences. Never since have I witnessed such strenuous attempts to evade realistic criticism of a game. I think we can all learn something from looking at this review, if only that we should never read or write anything like it ever again. Not that you could easily replicate something of this particular standard of writing... It reminds me of the beauty of words in the same way that a freshly-coiled turd reminds me of the miracle of life.

1 comment:

Nick said...

I hate to bring politics into this, but that guys MSG4 review has all the misguided self-confidence of a Nazi rally.

It actually scares me dude :(

"For you see, this game is available for purchase to all, even the lowest forms of humanity who should deservedly combust and be reduced to ashes in the divine presence of it."

I'm pretty sure there are people on this planet who don't have access to it. 'Lowest forms'? Like I said: Aryan.